Maybe you’re considering getting another conversion. But what about the mezuzahs you already have on your doors? In your new community (even if it’s within the same geographic area), you are not (or “might not” be) halachically a Jew. Mezuzot on your doors could confuse people, and technically, you aren’t obligated in the mitzvah. Of […]
Judge Favorably, But Don’t Ignore Red Flags
I have a big rallying point that I try to drive home in the born-Jewish community: Conversion candidates are the canaries in the mine of Judaism. If you don’t know the analogy, here’s what Wikipedia has to say: “Canaries were once regularly used in coal mining as an early warning system. Toxic gases such as carbon monoxide, methane […]
How to Prepare for Your First Beit Din Meeting
You finally have a date with your full beit din! Yay! …Now what? Whatever you do, don’t panic. Google “how to cope with stress” if you need tips on how to keep your calm over the next few days or weeks. Nervousness will trip you up in the meeting and make you forget basic facts. […]
Controversies You Should Understand: Chabad Conversions
I’ve been trying to decide how to approach the Chabad question for several months. It is definitely an issue that needs to be addressed for conversion candidates because many discover Judaism through local Chabad houses. However, it is difficult to handle a controversy fairly and without making too many people angry! I am not Chabad, […]
Does the Squeaky Wheel Get the Grease?
Thanks to the ever-helpful Lifehacker blog, I came across this Psychology Today article: Are You Teaching People to Treat You Badly? Essentially, a psychological theory says that if you don’t “punish” people who treat you badly, they become conditioned to treating you badly. They think it’s ok to treat you badly. As a dog trainer, this is […]
Why Batei Din Are Opposed to You Living Long Distances from Synagogue
This is an interesting issue that came up in a comment, and I thought it deserved its own post. Why can’t you finish a conversion so long as you live a significant walking distance from shul? To start, what distance ARE they looking for? Typically, you are alright if you are living “within the eruv,” […]
Convert Questions: Is Conversion Faster If You Have a Prior Conversion?
Many conversion candidates believe that a prior conversion will speed up the time of a second conversion. (If you are in the unlucky group that gets to 3+ conversions, you’re more likely in the territory of geirus l’chumrah than “normal” geirus.) After all, it makes sense: you’ve already “cast your lot with the Jewish people,” […]
Conversion from the Rabbi’s Perspective
People are both pleased and dismayed by the “streamlining” of orthodox conversion since 2006. Some believe it standardizes the process and releases “regular” rabbis from dealing with conversion issues (which your average rabbi is not well-versed in). Others feel that American rabbis capitulated to the Israeli Rabbinate and that the process invites abuse by concentrating […]
Conversion Special Cases: Converting with Children from a Prior Relationship
This post is going to be a cross-over between my two main “specialties”: conversion issues and law. NOTE: I am not a family lawyer, but I did work in a family law office as a student for half of law school. While I loved working in family law, I don’t plan to practice family law […]
Why Insincere Conversion Candidates Matter
GIANT IMPORTANT POINT: This issue can approach a fine line between protecting the community and bullying. Before you accuse someone (to their face in private or to a rabbi in private) of being an insincere conversion candidate, CAREFULLY consider your motives for doing so, your options for action, and how your actions will affect the […]