Let’s be blunt – this shouldn’t have to be said, but here we are. If you’re in the middle of the Jewish conversion process and a rabbi asks you out (or does things that feel like dating)? That’s not okay. The power imbalance in conversion is real, and it matters. You deserve safety, clarity, and […]
When Gatekeeping Becomes Dangerous: Sexual Harassment in the Jewish Conversion Process
“Sexual harassment and abuse can and do happen during the Jewish conversion process – and we need to talk about it.” That’s the heart of this video. It’s not just a one-off scandal or a bad-apple rabbi. It’s a systemic vulnerability created by intense power imbalances, isolation, and a gatekeeping structure where one person’s word […]
What to Expect the 1st Time You Attend Synagogue
So you’ve been reading books, scrolling social media, reading this blog…and you think you’re ready to go to a synagogue service for the first time. The mechanics and the level of “oh no what have I gotten myself into I am not ready for this” will be different between orthodox and non-orthodox services only because […]
Dressing “Frum” at the Gym
I think I’ve always been surprised how commonly people (usually women) ask about halacha and going to the gym. But especially about headcoverings and the gym. Yet I don’t see men asking about their yarmulkes at the gym 🤷 In short, your mileage will vary considerably. Ask people in your community. If you’re in the conversion process or […]
What If You Don’t Like One of the Mitzvot…Can You Still Convert Orthodox?
One of the biggest disagreements about conversion is kabbalot ol mitzvot, the acceptance of the yoke of the commandments. In case you don’t remember, yoke mean burden, not to be confused with a yolk. Fun fact: the “stock” from “being put in the stocks” is a human yoke. Criminals and slaves were put in stocks. […]
Immediately After Conversion, What Needs to Be Done?
You’re in the mikvah. You have your dips in the water and officially cross over into the obligation in mitzvot. What happens once you get dressed? First mitzvah/bracha. This should not happen in the mikvah because you shouldn’t say a bracha while nude. I think some people hear about the “here, have a candy!” bracha […]
Shidduchim and Nose Jobs
I have a well-documented enjoyment of the Groggers. They released a new song on Valentine’s Day, and I wasn’t planning to comment on it. It’s the first song off their upcoming (as yet unnamed, apparently) album: Jewcan Sam (A Nose Job Love Song). As always, power pop/punk combined with satire makes me happy. But I don’t […]
Is a Circumcision Absolutely Required for Male Conversion?
I’m reading an interesting book I plan to review on the blog soon. The book describes a halachic issue that never occurred to me before: Can a man convert if a medical condition prevents him from getting a circumcision? Apparently, according to most authorities, no. In fact, at least one great Rabbi (Rabbi Yehiel Yaakov […]
Should You Make Up a “Jew-y” Name for Yourself?
Disclaimer: All names in this post are completely made up (and often from random name generators). If I happened to accidentally choose your name, I apologize. Well, except for the famous names. I just felt like using those. It’s very common for converts to take on a Hebrew name as their “everyday” name, even if […]
UPDATED: Menstrual Cycles and the Mikvah
You’re a smart cookie, so you already know that the laws of taharat hamishpacha require a married woman to go to the mikvah after a waiting period that comes after the period ends or a certain number of days. So that means you have to plan your conversion mikvah date equally carefully, right? Not necessarily. […]
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