good advice - Building a Jewish Life

Dressing “Frum” at the Gym

I think I’ve always been surprised how commonly people (usually women) ask about halacha and going to the gym. But especially about headcoverings and the gym. Yet I don’t see men asking about their yarmulkes at the gym 🤷 In short, your mileage will vary considerably. Ask people in your community. If you’re in the conversion process or […]

Friendships When a Liberal Convert Goes Orthodox

I came across this question on social media again recently, and it has been a frequent concern over the years: “I converted in one Jewish movement and now want to convert orthodox. What will happen to my friendships and my relationship with my former rabbi(s)? Will they hate me? Am I betraying them?” First, I’ll […]

Pesach: The Red Sea Beach Diet

Tonight starts Passover. Despite being chol hamoed, I intend to have posts next week. I hope you have a chag kasher v’sameach! So. Pesach is here. Let’s assume this is your first or second Pesach (particularly speaking to those of you who haven’t converted yet), and that you’re trying to “do it all” this year. […]

Pesach Cleaning Got You Down?

I hope you all enjoyed my prank yesterday! That is the only successful prank I’ve ever done. I am physically incapable of playing a prank because my face gives it away every time. Enter…the anonymity of the interwebz. If you have no idea what happened, check out this explanation: What Is a Rick Roll? And no, I’m […]

Can You Be an Orthodox Jew Who Happens to Be Vegetarian or Vegan?

YES! But uh…it depends on who you ask. There is a halachic basis for the rabbis who declare you must eat meat on Shabbat. (Though even they will admit there was a great rabbi-whose name I forget-who was vegetarian every day but Shabbat.) I find most of these rabbis tend to be far to the […]

What If You Don’t Like One of the Mitzvot…Can You Still Convert Orthodox?

One of the biggest disagreements about conversion is kabbalot ol mitzvot, the acceptance of the yoke of the commandments. In case you don’t remember, yoke mean burden, not to be confused with a yolk. Fun fact: the “stock” from “being put in the stocks” is a human yoke. Criminals and slaves were put in stocks. […]

Immediately After Conversion, What Needs to Be Done?

You’re in the mikvah. You have your dips in the water and officially cross over into the obligation in mitzvot. What happens once you get dressed? First mitzvah/bracha. This should not happen in the mikvah because you shouldn’t say a bracha while nude. I think some people hear about the “here, have a candy!” bracha […]

Nullifying Conversions vs. Questioning Conversions

If you’re going to convert, you need to understand a key distinction. There’s a lot of talk since 2006 about nullifying conversions. While a few nullifications have occurred, the general problem is questioned conversions. Nullified conversion: the conversion is void. It was invalid at the time the conversion was performed. The person was never halachically […]

How Do You Congratulate a New Convert?

This has been a surprisingly contentious issue. What do you say to someone upon finishing their conversion? Congratulations in English is a simple, easy way to do convey all the possible emotions. Out of the 200+ congratulations I’ve received in person and online, almost all people said “mazal tov!” to me, and I think that’s […]

Is a Circumcision Absolutely Required for Male Conversion?

I’m reading an interesting book I plan to review on the blog soon. The book describes a halachic issue that never occurred to me before: Can a man convert if a medical condition prevents him from getting a circumcision? Apparently, according to most authorities, no. In fact, at least one great Rabbi (Rabbi Yehiel Yaakov […]