Reason #254 You Know You’re American: You’ve memorized the before-eating food brachot, but you don’t even know which one to use because you have no idea where your food comes from. (Since two of the brachot require knowing whether the fruit/vegetable came from a tree or a bush.)
Shabbat shalom, ya’ll!
Shabbat shalom, ya’ll! I’ll be off the interwebs until Saturday evening. But there are plenty of posts sitting in my editor, just waiting to be posted. Proud moment of the day: Saw very obviously observant Jews at the grocery store who were also very obviously lost. I got to explain the weirdness of our 5 […]
Reason #1 You Know You’re Crazy: You’re Suspicious of Kindness
Reason #1 You Know You’re Crazy: You’re Suspicious of Kindness As any of you converts/converts-in-progress know, the conversion process, despite being an incredibly worthwhile, meaningful, and “religious” experience, can be soul-crushing when well-meaning (or not so well-meaning) Jews try to “discourage” you. Sometimes this discouragement can cross the line over into flat-out rude or cruel. […]
Reason #201 You Know You’re Crazy: Unpronounceable Hebrew Names
Reason #201 You Know You’re Crazy: You chose a Hebrew name for yourself that you can’t pronounce correctly with any consistency. In my case, I chose Kochava, which has that guttral “ch” sound smack dab in the middle of the word, which is even harder than pronouncing it when it’s at the beginning or end […]
Reason #84 You Know You’re Crazy: Orthodox Conversion is EXPENSIVE!
Reason #84 You Know You’re Crazy: An Orthodox Conversion is EXPENSIVE. Really. My conservative conversion cost me nothing other than one required paperback book for my Introduction to Judaism class. I think I bought it on Half.com for 5 bucks. To get to my first meeting with an orthodox beit din, I spent approximately $1,000 […]
Reason #483 You Know You’re Crazy: Don’t Mess with the Zohan
Reason #483 You Know You’re Crazy: You were SO excited to see Don’t Mess with the Zohan because you really wanted to know what stereotypes American Jews have about Israelis. And you sat there with rapt attention. But then discouraged your non-Jewish family from ever seeing it.
Kiruv and (Non-Orthodox) Converts
I tried to get some Hebrew reading help from a kiruv organization that offers free tutoring to any Jew. Interestingly, they will work with gay Jews, intermarried Jews, or any other non-Orthodox Jew. However, they will not work with a convert who has had a non-Orthodox conversion because we are “not Jewish.” Of course, they […]
Changing from Jeans-and-T-Shirts to Skirts-and-Sleeves
I’ve always been a jeans-and-t-shirts kind of girl. Very low maintenance. So much so that I didn’t even know I have an obsessive compulsion to color-coordinate until my freshman year of college! Beginning to work in a professional field had partially ruined this tendency, but in April 2010, I switched full-time to knee-length or longer […]
The Best Part of Converting
You know the best part about converting? Preparing for a mitzvah IS a mitzvah, so I will eventually get “credit” for all the things I’m doing pre-Conversion 2.0. Why is this awesome? It means that even my most awful, stupid mistakes are actually a mitzvah in themselves rather than being a chet that might turn […]
Mandatory Introduction
Here is the mandatory introduction. As any Jewish convert/convert-in-progress knows, when you’re converting to Judaism, sometimes you just wanna know you’re not crazy. This will hopefully help keep me accountable to my learning, as well as sharing those funny little moments when you wonder if you’re crazy. Disclaimer: in all areas of my life, I […]
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