Most Jewish converts don’t get “outed” by a rude question. They get outed by ordinary conversation. If you’ve ever found yourself frozen mid–small talk, suddenly aware that the next question will push you into sharing something private you didn’t plan to explain, you already know how this happens. Jewish geography – the well-meaning, mildly competitive […]
The Social Game Every Jewish Convert Eventually Loses Read Post »
Converting to Judaism for love isn’t new — it’s ancient. People love to say “don’t convert for a partner,” but love has always been one of the holiest doors into Judaism. Relationships — romantic, familial, or friendship — are how most people have joined the Jewish people throughout history. You’re not doing it wrong. You’re
I Converted Because I Dated a Nice Jewish Boy™ Read Post »
When I started my Jewish journey, nobody told me that the biggest costs wouldn’t be the obvious ones. Sure, I expected to pay for books, classes, maybe some ritual items. But what blindsided me were the hidden costs—the unpaid time off for holidays, the career shifts, the synagogue memberships, even the emotional toll of burnout.
Is Converting to Judaism More Expensive Than You Think? | Conversion on a Budget Part 3 Read Post »
Converting to Judaism is already hard… don’t make it harder. I’ve spent over 15 years helping people navigate the Jewish conversion process—and I’ve made more than a few mistakes myself. Some of them were honest. Some were based in fear or confusion. And some… well, I didn’t know any better. But here’s the thing: there
What NOT to Do When Converting to Judaism Read Post »
Let’s be blunt – this shouldn’t have to be said, but here we are. If you’re in the middle of the Jewish conversion process and a rabbi asks you out (or does things that feel like dating)? That’s not okay. The power imbalance in conversion is real, and it matters. You deserve safety, clarity, and
When a Rabbi Crosses the Line: What’s Not Okay During Conversion Read Post »
“Sexual harassment and abuse can and do happen during the Jewish conversion process – and we need to talk about it.” That’s the heart of this video. It’s not just a one-off scandal or a bad-apple rabbi. It’s a systemic vulnerability created by intense power imbalances, isolation, and a gatekeeping structure where one person’s word
When Gatekeeping Becomes Dangerous: Sexual Harassment in the Jewish Conversion Process Read Post »
I have a well-documented enjoyment of the Groggers. They released a new song on Valentine’s Day, and I wasn’t planning to comment on it. It’s the first song off their upcoming (as yet unnamed, apparently) album: Jewcan Sam (A Nose Job Love Song). As always, power pop/punk combined with satire makes me happy. But I don’t
Shidduchim and Nose Jobs Read Post »
Born Jews are very quick to throw out the advice that a conversion candidate should “try being a Noachide!” They’re very enthusiastic about this, but I find that they rarely know what it entails, much less what it is really like to be a Noachide. Most can’t even name the seven laws. Yet they are
Why Not Be a Noachide? Read Post »
Disclaimer: All names in this post are completely made up (and often from random name generators). If I happened to accidentally choose your name, I apologize. Well, except for the famous names. I just felt like using those. It’s very common for converts to take on a Hebrew name as their “everyday” name, even if
Should You Make Up a “Jew-y” Name for Yourself? Read Post »
In short: Just pick one. Your options: A full 6 hours 5 hours and one minute 3 hours 1 hour (Almost no one does this, and you better be able to say you’re Dutch or in a Dutch community. I have a Dutch name, I really should have considered this option.) I believe there is
How to Choose a Waiting Time Between Meat and Milk Read Post »